Things That Make You Go Hmmm…

I was at the grocery store today and marveled, once again, at a familiar scene. I was wheeling my cart down the aisle when I noticed a woman standing next to the jars of spaghetti sauce, reading the label on a product in her hand. As I approached, we made eye contact briefly, and then she went back to reading the label. So far so good, right? Well…as I grew even closer, I realized her cart blocked half the aisle, and she stood a foot or so away from the cart, which meant no one could pass without either the cart or her body moving out of the way.

I saw her sideways glance in my direction when my cart reached hers, but still she didn’t budge. Hummm… Even though I knew she had seen me, I still said, “Excuse me,” and smiled politely (sorta, kinda politely). Now here is where it gets interesting. She looked up from the jar in her hand, touched her chest as if I had just surprised the snot out of her, and she truly appeared to be surprised. Hum….Either this woman was an amazing actress, or she was one egg short of a dozen—you know what I mean? How could she not have seen me when we made eye contact? Did she really think I just magically appeared out of thin air? Even if she didn’t see me, she mostly would have heard me. My rickety cart was clinkin’ and clankin’ something fierce.

And how about people doing crazy (this is my nice way of saying stupid) things while driving? Granted, I’ve been known to do a stupid thing or two in my day, but at least I rarely do them all at the same time! A few days ago, traffic was congested on the express way, but then it finally opened up as I approached my exit. After it opened up, I was cruising along when a woman in a red little beater pulled in front of me. From where I sat, it looked like she was brushing her hair with one hand, and applying lip gloss with the other. Had she not have pulled in front of me and then decided to break for no apparent reason, I wouldn’t have noticed what she was doing. Why do people do that? If there had been a car in front of her that would have been one thing. But clearly, there was no one in front of her. No, this woman simply decided to ride her break all the way down the expressway. Hum…

Come on, people, I can’t be the only one who sees this stuff. What kind of crazy behavior have you witnessed lately?

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My Dog is Not for Sale

Sometimes I wonder if I’m a human magnet for strange people. It seems like the odder the duck the more likely they are to find their way to my door. It never fails. So I’ve grown accustom to expecting peculiar things to happen when I’m around. Case in point…I was out and about walking my five pound Yorkie, who thinks she’s queen of the universe, and as always she strutted down the street with her usual tough-girl bravado. This is her.

little-trisha-2

 

A late model black muscle car slowed as it neared us, passed, and then made an abrupt stop a few yards away. The driver’s window rolled down, and a guy stuck his head out and shouted, “Your dog for sale?”  

Now me, being well…me, almost said, “Why sure, Mr. Tony Soprano Jr. Here, take my precious little baby, and feed her to your rottweiler. Two hundred bucks and she’s all yours.”

 

The guy’s hard eyes stared at me and my little girl like he was tempted to put the car in reverse, roll back up the hill, and snatch my little munchkin from my death-grip. “Uh, no,” I said. Thankfully he drove off, but I can tell you this. I would have seriously gone Ninja on that man if he had tried to take my munchkin. 

Kee-YAAhh!!

Kee-YAAhh!!

 

 

Nobody messes with the precious. Not even Tony Soprano Jr. or whatever his name was.

 

I’m sure all of you, at some point in your life, have interacted with a peculiar stranger. What would you say is the oddest thing a stranger has ever said to you or done in your presence?

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